Living with a smoker

[versora]

Ah. That's good to know. I'll take any precaution out there. I would love to be able to not do the whoe Boy-in-the-plastic-bubble. I do have Oxi Clean. I at least soak my fabric scraps in that and wash them by hand. It sucks that I can't have nice things out aside from my knick-knacks.

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

Thanks Versora. And I can imagine you do - and if he's down to that little a week... ahh - I dunno. I've never been addicted to nicotine so I dunno how easy it is to give up on that little.

MC - your mother was truly lucky the cancer got treated after being undetected that long! It's good she's kept off the smoking too

[MeltedCaramel]

Versora Well, since he is your first doll, and I don't think you're planning on selling him, if you take all of the other precautions listed above and then just keep the doll in-box inside a clear plastic storage box with a decent seal (they sell ones that have clamps that come up over the top and pull the lid tight to the box which makes for a better seal so less air can get in) you're looking at a "mostly smoke free" doll. All of that should be enough to really halt the process. The last resort would the 'the boy in the bubble'. Also, make sure you put the box somewhere where your hubby doesn't stand and smoke.

As for Nicotine....it's EXTREMELY ADDICTIVE, it's just as addictive as hardcore drugs, especially so because smokers feel the need to "calm down" with nicotine when they're stressed. My mother has been smoke free for going on four years now ( ) and she openly admits she loved smoking, and could not have quit cold turkey if her life literally wasn't in the balance. She still feels cravings to smoke, loves the smell of it (aughh I know disgusting), and the only thing keeping her off of cigarettes is myself and my younger sister.

ShortNCuddlyAm You have no idea what a miracle it was. She was misdiagnosed. The doctor told her that her large, hard-as-a-rock stomach was a hernia. When it continued to grow, my grandmother basically manhandled my mother into going to the ER. They were convinced she was a chronic drunk and that it was her liver shutting down (she doesn't drink at all), and kept treating her like one until her tests came back. When they did the surgery, her tumor and the fluid it had accumulated weighed more than forty pounds. It is truly, TRULY a miracle. I'm not religious per se, but my mother walked away from "the silent killer" (ovarian cancer's infamous nickname) without even having to do radiation therapy. Some things, I just can't explain, to me, that goes beyond luck.

But in other news, yes, I am extremely proud of her for staying off the cigarettes. She's had many failed attempts over the years, and the most she'd ever gotten to was a year, but this time, it's for good.

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

MC I am gobsmacked and truly pleased for both of you . I lost an aunt (the one I grew up with) to that - she went through two or three years of hell being misdiagnosed (hernia and IBS are the two I remember - there were others) and by the time they realised what it was it was too late - although they did all they could to get rid of it. So consequently every success story I hear makes me smile.

[versora]

Well this may come to a shocker to you all, but Hubby and I are looking for a new place to stay. Wee need more room, and since HUD jacked up our rent due to hubby now working full time now, they decided to hit us hard. We can barley buy food or gas after the monthly rent.

So I am nosing around our little area for new houses. I plan on moving mom in with us. She's all alone and I worry about her. Plus our kid is close to the age where he wants his own space and a teeny tiny two room one bath apt. isn't big enough. So maybe I can get hubby his own smoking room. But I will definitely follow all the suggestions I got. I'm OCD a tad and I like my nice things well preotected.

[MeltedCaramel]

ShortNCuddlyAm Thank you so much for your support. I truly don't wish ill on other people but I don't think I could be that strong, losing someone important to me and then hearing success stories from others. It would dig the knife in a little deeper each time even as I would be glad for the other person. Ah, I am truly jaded. Still, your strength of character amazes me. (Also, seriously, your aunt was diagnosed with a hernia as well? What is wrong with doctors!? ) My family has a somewhat unfortunate history with cancer so everyone was going through hell when the diagnosis was made and when she walked away from a major surgery with literally nothing more to we we all must have looked like someone had smacked us silly because we had been prepared for the long haul.

Versora Ah!! I'm not sure if you looking to move is a good thing or a bad thing dear!! I hope it is a good thing. This will fix your problem though, tell him he needs to smoke OUTSIDE from now on. It's a chance to start relatively fresh and while hubby may smell like cigarettes, the rest of the house and particularly YOUR possessions don't have to. Tell him he can have his nicotine, but it's bothering you to the point that you and he need to come to some sort of compromise. Tell him other people can smell you (trust me, they can, people just are too polite to say anything most of the time, every time I sit next to a smoker I can tell in an instant) and that it's upsetting you and affecting how you feel about yourself. (Get an acting degree, work the dramatics! ) Say that while you don't like what he's doing to his health, you understand his right to smoke as a grown man, but you have a right to come to a happy medium for you both.

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

MC - from what I remember of the time, apparently IBS is the most common misdiagnosis, with hernia as one of the next most likely misdiagnoses. In my aunt's case, they tried to treat what was apparently the most likely cause of her problems, despite none of the treatment actually helping. The strength of character - thank you I think it's something I learned from her, actually. So I'm not entirely sure if it's strength of character or just honouring that. If that makes sense. And I wouldn't say you're jaded - you don't come across that way, and I think most people would react like that.

Versora - Good luck in finding a suitable place! Get somewhere that's got a bit of a garden if yo can so you can get a shed for him to smoke in He gets a smoking room, everyone else gets a smoke free house

[versora]

Melted Caramel and Shortncuddly: Well I found the perfect house, and it's in our price range too, and bonus, hubby likes the house too. All we need now is get the proper things in order, which will take a while. Longer than I want since it's snowing here again, which means being cooped up.

[ShortNCuddlyAm]

Fingers crossed the snow clears soon, so things start moving quickly for you!

[MeltedCaramel]

ShortNCuddlyAm I know ovarian cancer is one of the hardest to detect...they always say "once there are signs, it's too late", which is what makes what happened with my mother even more of a miracle. They told her that her tumour was like carrying twins which was how huge it was. Her stomach felt like a rock. For a cancer known to be 'silent', hers certainly dialed the volume up to 11, for which I will forever be grateful. And as for strength of character...no matter if it's something ingrained or something you learned by honouring her, that is true strength of character, 100%.

And I wouldn't say you're jaded - you don't come across that way, and I think most people would react like that.

<---You really are too sweet. Thank you, so, so much. <33

As for versora's situation....Ahaha, now I just picture you buying him a doghouse to smoke in. Like his "smoking room" is getting smaller and smaller in our subsequent comments. First it's the doll in the bag/box, then it's his own smoking room, then it's outside,then it's a shed, and now I'm picturing a doghouse. Next comment it's going to be his own smoking roach motel.